Hey there! If you have stumbled on this blog post, you are curious about how I got my ex back after the unthinkable happened. If you aren’t familiar with me, I am the brains behind thelovegal.com, the author of Getting Back the Relationship that You Always Wanted: How to Get Your Ex Back Instruction Manual, and the face behind the “Get Your Ex Back” YouTube channel. This article is to tell all of my supporters how I got my ex back after he declared he was completely done with me.

This wasn’t any regular breakup. This one hurt to the core. Not only did my boyfriend leave me, but I had to watch him be with someone else. He turned on me like I was the one in the wrong. It was a very confusing time in my life. I know you’re probably thinking, “why would you want to be with someone like that?” Love is a drug, and it’s addicting. If you are here to seek advice, then you know what I mean.

How I Got My Ex Back After It Seemed Impossible

Impossible may sound extreme to some but it really did seem like getting him back was impossible. I maneuvered back into his life through the “back door”. Trying to get through to him by simply talking wasn’t working. So, I decided to keep him close but not too close. Here are the steps that I took to make sure this went smoothly. If you follow the steps below, you will be headed in the right direction.

1. Take a Break to Get Your Emotions Together. I did carry out the no contact rule. I did it for myself and him. Breakups are hard but trying to fix something broken when you feel broken won’t get you anywhere. Don’t worry, it’s okay to give space after a breakup. They won’t forget about you. This break won’t belong. It won’t be long enough for them to move on. However, after a breakup, we have to give them time to clear their mind. You need time to clear your mind as well.
2. Turn the tables on them and agree with the breakup. Many people suffer from this step. Many people think that it’s not a good idea because they think that their ex is will be happy with this step and move on forever. I will be the first one to tell you that you can’t fix a problem with the same mind that created it. Whether you take advice from someone who has fixed their relationship, or, switch your way of thinking. Your way of trying to get your ex back hasn’t worked so far for a reason.
3. Get your life together. It’s easy to get caught up in your feelings at this time. Don’t fall into the realm of feeling sorry for yourself. Moping around the house and feeling sorry for yourself will only make matters worse. Keep in mind that whatever energy that you’re putting out there will attract back to you. Get up! You are worth more than you’re giving yourself credit for. Just because your ex isn’t seeing your worth doesn’t mean you’re worthless. The last thing you want is your ex taking you back because they feel sorry for yourself. Get up and demand from the universe what you want. Positive changes start with positive energy. Get a makeover, go out with your friends, clean your house up, etc..
4. Analyze and fix the issues that you can control. Never stress over things that you can’t control. If your ex is treating you a way that is less than desirable for no reason, don’t overreact to it. Their actions have nothing to do with you. However, if there were things that you could have done differently, admit it. Even if it doesn’t work out permanently with this ex, you can learn from your actions. Ask yourself, what could you have done differently? Don’t just think about it. Correct your way of thinking that led to the breakup. I’m not saying that this is your fault. However, you may have missed signs that your ex-girlfriend or boyfriend was showing you. They could have shown you that they weren’t the right person for you but you ignored it.
5. Develop a positive outlook on life. Negative attracts negative and positive and positive attracts more positive. Focus on things that make you happy – not things that ruin your mood. I try to look at the glass half full always. Life is what you make it and one situation doesn’t define you.
6. Practice Law of Attraction. The law of attraction and the law of expectation are two of my favorite laws. The law of attraction states that you get what you focus on. The law of expectation states that what you want will come if you expect it to come. With that being said, you are controlling your own life with your thoughts. If you think that your ex won’t come back, they won’t. However, if you expect them to come back then they will. You have to truly believe in your thoughts. Once you believe in your thoughts, you must get in alignment to receive your request. How do you do that? Increase your vibration. You do that by only entertaining things and thoughts that make you happy. On the vibrational scale, gratitude and appreciation are the fastest way to raise your vibration. Start and end your days with thanking God and/or the universe what you are thankful for now. It doesn’t matter how big or small it is. Throughout the day, affirm what you want as well.
7. Open communication with them but keep it short. In my book on how to get your ex back, I speak on sending your ex a letter to agree with the breakup. What this does is ease the pressure from your ex. You don’t want them to feel like anytime they talk to you will be an emotional rollercoaster. You want them to feel like they can talk and be around you without you pressuring them into a relationship. In this case, taking a step back will move you forward. Rejecting them in this letter will make your ex want you more. This is proven. You have to do this correctly, though. This is the first step of opening communication. When your ex reaches out, keep the conversation short. You want them to want more. Texting and talking to them all day before you guys get back together will ruin your chances if you’re not at the point where both of you have agreed to reconcile.
8. Follow their lead. If you want to know where your ex is with you, look at their actions. Don’t rush it. If they feel like you’re the one that they want to be with then their actions will let you know.  Some reconciliation takes longer. In my case, communication picked back up two weeks after I sent the letter. He initiated calling me about a month after. We started hanging out again two months after that. We began talking daily three months after that. We were officially back together five months after that. Every situation is different. When we did get back together, it was totally different from before. That’s the goal.

Download My Full Guide on How to Get Your Ex Back

You can download a copy of my guide here.